Nostradamus Speaks - Writer's Block

The Writer's Block

"Hi, my name is Clarise and I'm a writer," thus spoke Clarise, Chair of the Little Saigon chapter of Writer's Block SoCal, a network of budding and accomplished writers seeking to hone their craft and get rich and famous.

"We have a newcomer tonight, so let's get ready to rumble!"

The excitement was palpable. Clarise left the lectern and nodded me forward.

I made my way to the front clutching a how-to-do-it card in my very large hand: 

"Hi, my name is (insert your name here), and I am a writer." 

Tell the group a little bit about the writing side of you.

"Hi, my name is Number One, and I am a writer." I dutifully read and said, "And I'd like to tell you a little bit about the writing side of me.

"I am the Chief Spokesperson, communications chief and writer for an international think tank." 

This was basically true, I think, even if I puffed it up a bit.

"I write a semi-irregular bulletin called Nostradamus Speaks that transmits the message of the think tank's head, Dr. Michel de Nostradamus."

A voice from the back interrupted, "This is a gathering of writers, not stenographers."

Another voice chimed in, crisply British, "Yes indeed, dear boy, are you a scrivener, a scribe, a mere clerical note taker, or are you a writer?"

Let the rumble begin.

Perhaps it was the British accent that triggered a long forgotten association. "I see my role as a modern day Boswell."

This prompted a condescending sneer. "Surely you jest," the Brit sniffed, "And your man is Dr. Johnson, I presume?"

"Yes." I said, "I think he is, and if you had heard my man give a week-long standing room only seminar at the Paris-Sorbonne, you might back off a bit. And don't call me Shirley."

I think my ready defense couched in the historical reference to the famous 18th Century Boswell - Samuel Johnson collaboration did back off the attack dogs a bit. English Lit to the rescue.

"But," I added, "Boswell based his biography of Johnson on the copious notes he took while traveling with Johnson on a grand tour of Europe and Scotland." 

I waited -- a suspenseful moment prompting my erudite audience to take pause: this Number One guy might actually have some educational chops.

"Unlike Boswell, I do not take notes. None, nada, zilch. Neither written or mental. I rely entirely on memory in preparing Nostradamus Speaks."

They were impressed. Me too. My audience was listening.

Another man spoke up. "How do you keep it all together? You don't even take mental notes?"

"Introduce yourself, Howard," Chair Clarise interrupted.

Howard obliged, "Hi, my name is Howard and I am a writer. I am a screenwriter and have filing cabinets full of notes. One night I had the complete storyline of a Harry Potter all worked out in my head but didn't write it down. I deeply regret that........

Clarise interrupted again, "We've all been there, done that, Howard. Go on, Number One."

"That's right Howard," I repeated, "No notes, written or mental. I don't try to remember what happened, I try to pay attention. Taking even mental notes distracts. Then, when I write up what happened with Dr. Nostradamus or in related events, I try to re-live and re-create in my mind the entirety of what was said and done."

"That's impossible unless you have an eidetic or photographic memory. Do you?" said name tag George.

"No. I’m working on it though." I said.

George countered, "I'm sorry, Number One, but memory is not reliable. It doesn't take a scientist to point that out. 

"Yes, memory is highly unreliable and malleable. How do you get it right?" Edith name tagged older woman asked.

"Introductions people, introductions," reminded Chair Clarise.

"Honestly, Edith, I am not sure that I do always get it right. But I think that I get it right enough."

Okay people," Chair Clarise announced, "Number One has given us a little bit about the writing side of himself but now it is time for -- The Talk.

"Nigel, would you do the honors tonight?"

The snobbish Brit made his way to the lectern, "With pleasure, Madame Chair." 

"Hi, my name is Nigel, and ....

"Just get on with it, Nigel," Clarise interrupted.

"Very well then, getting on with it:

"Why Do We Write?

We write to learn how to think.

We write to give voice and impose discipline and structure on the images, abstractions, and emotions that rattle around in our minds.

We write to learn how to understand.

We write to effectively communicate to others.

We write because writing is our passion, our joy,

And because writing is the power and the glory forever and ever!"

With that Chair Clarise led the group in a standing ovation, "Bravo, bravo, bravo!" I too jumped to my feet and joined in the collective accolade.

I'm gonna like this place.

Dixi