Secret Agent Man
That was the text message I sent to my employer Dr. Michel de Nostradamus, the famed prognosticator and time traveler using our exclusive-use-only-on-important-occasions-text-message-account.
I received an immediate response: “Is this important?”
Me: “Yes. In case you didn’t notice I used the exclusive-use-only-on-important-occasions-text-message-account.”
Dr. N: “Meet me at 2:15 p.m.”
Me: “Thank you. Where?”
Dr. N: “Be there.”
Now where in the blankety-blank is there? Oh, right, he’s the man and there’s an app for that.
So at 2:10 p.m. sharp I drove to the nearest strip mall and circled the lot until 2:14 p.m. when I parked and then, at exactly 2:15 p.m. stepped into a donut shop I had never before visited. I’ll show the man who's the man.
No sooner had the bell on the door handle stopped jingling behind me and my eyes adapted to the dim light than who should I see hunched over a cheap formica top table munching on a puffy glazed donut? Who else?
“Dr. N,” I said, “This is spooky and I’m getting paranoid.”
“Chill, Number One,” the good doctor said, “I'll cover this when we get to the time travel and free will sections of the course. Now, what's so important?”
“Boss,” I said, “I am getting blowback from several of my sleeper cell coordinators. A significant number of your so-called “sleepers” have no idea they are even in a sleeper cell; don’t want to be in a sleeper cell; and don’t want to get woke, whatever that means.”
“That’s not your problem, Grasshopper,” Dr N said, “It’s mine. And it’s not even a problem. This is what you need to do now; pay attention: In your next posting include the words, “the River Sphinx” three times in a row."
“Huh?” I stammered. “That doesn’t even make sense."
Dr. Nostradamus repeated himself, “I’m going to repeat myself to make sure you know exactly what it is you have to do. In your next communique include the words, “the River Sphinx” three times in a row. That's an activation code. Find an innocuous context that will not arouse suspicion or even curiosity. Works like a charm, which it is.”
“Wow!” I said, “Wow!” I am not easily impressed but this was impressive -- secret agent stuff.
“Are we done?” he asked.
Recovering from my awe I quickly down shifted. “Dr N,” I asked, “Why are you doing all this? And why me?”
“Those are discussions for another time, Grasshopper,” Michel de Nostradamus replied, “See you Tuesday at 9:00 a.m.”
“Okay Sensei, see you then.”
With that the good doctor rose and walked out, the door bells jingling behind him.
“Where?!” I shouted after him. "Oh, never mind.” I turned back muttering to myself.
Walking over to the counter I asked the clerk, “Did you see the guy who just left?”
“You mean the guy with the beard you yelled at?” She answered. “Why?”
“Never mind.” I said. “I’ll have three glazed and three plain."
Dixi
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